Friday, August 19, 2005

P Something?

Break it Down
I am going to try and break down an interview so that the real, true and clear message can be understood. Some of these famous people have problems with their communication skills. So, I am here to help.

Recently the Rap mogul, producer, actor, whatever, Sean-john, a.k.a Sean Combs, a.k.a. Sean "P" Combs, a.k.a. Sean Puff Daddy, a.k.a Sean Puffy Combs, a.k.a. Puff Daddy, a.k.a. Mr. Combs, a.k.a. P. Diddy, a.k.a. WTF?, decided to change his name...again. What a GD good idea. He wanted to eliminate all of the confusion. Less confusion= changing your name for the upteenth time. Good God, like we need any more confusion. For cryin' out loud it would have been easier if he changed his name to a symbol like Prince did. But, then he'd be known as the artist formely known as the guy who's effin name nobody could ever GD remember.

I hope this makes it all a little clearer for everyone. The following is an interview he made to justify why he is changing his name again:

U.S. rapper Sean "P Diddy" Combs is changing his name again - by dropping the "P". Combs said he now wanted to be known just as "Diddy" as his old name was causing confusion and he wanted to "simplify things".

How the hell does dropping the "P" out of Sean "P Diddy" Combs leave only "Diddy"? WTF? Does that mean Sean "Diddy" Combs? Or, just "Diddy Combs? OKay, I can't help with this one. Moving along.

The 35-year-old singer and producer has already changed his nickname once - from Puff Daddy to P Diddy in 2001. The change forms part of a publicity campaign for the MTV Awards, which Diddy is hosting later this month.

"Uncomfortable" He told the New York Post that his name was even starting to confuse himself.

This means that when he said "what's my name...bitch?...he really meant it! Unless he was just talking dirty in the sack. He may have needed to remember his name because he screams out his own name during sex. Not sure. I'll move along.

"Nobody knew what to call me. I'd notice that people were uncomfortable when I'd meet them for the first time, and then they'd ask me what they should call me," he said. "I even started to get confused myself - and when I'd called someone on the telephone it took me a long time to explain who I was. Too long."

Okay. I will attempt to display what a typical phone conversation might go like.

Diddy: Hey, whaz up cuz? It's me Sean.

Individual: Who?
Diddy: P

Individual: Who?
Diddy: P!P!P!P!

Individual: Look asshole I could care less about whether or not you need to use the John. Freak!
Diddy: Wait, wait don't hang up. It's Puffy!

Individual: Puffy? What the hell? Look here you sick f**ck! I don't want to hear about your puffy johnson and how badly you need to take a piss. Moron.
Diddy: Puff daddy!!!!

Individual: Who the hell are you calling Daddy?
Diddy: Wait! Wait. Wait! *sigh*Combs, man.

Individual: Dude, you have got the wrong number. I am not a Pharmacist...nor have I had crabs or whatever else your bitchin about. They might have combs for crabs. I always thought it was for lice. I don't know. Good luck with that man. *CLICK*

Diddy: Shit

He added: "One word. Five letters. Period."

So there you have it! I hope I cleared some stuff up. Actually, I was probably of no help whatsoever. I'll just wait until he does the MTV awards and see what they call him when they announce his new GD name.



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