Monday, September 26, 2005

Tom Cruise is going to shoot his mouth off...again

Good old Tom has been out of the lime light and becoming bored. It's been quite awhile since he's been shooting his mouth off and calling everyone glib, etc. Ah, the good ole' days. Well, wait no more. He's back with a vengeance.

He's going to deliver some lectures about Scientology, mental health, depression, drug abuse and a few other things with really long made up words I've never heard of. If you want to know the history of's your chance. It's so funny to think about Tom Cruise lecturing about mental health. The irony. Anyway, there will be four different lectures about four different topics that will be simulcast on the web.

I can hardly wait. My favorite is titled "Handling Sexual Dis-Orientation: Out of the Closet and into the Auditing Room". I'm just going to sit here and snicker and laugh out loud all by myself. Some things just write themselves. I've underestimated Tommy boy, if he can get through an hour or so lecturing about this topic...well than, he's a way better actor than I have ever given him credit for. I have a feeling he's going to resemble his character in Magnolia. Just a hunch. That e-meter seemed to have worked wonders on him though. I hope he has a slip of the tongue and yells "You don't know the history of Homosexuality...I do." That probably won't happen though. Dammit.

"Quantum Electropsychometer?" What the @#$% is that? Here come the colanders, wires and duct tape. You might want to make a little hat out of tin foil and wear it while you are viewing these on the net. Just a suggestion.

Added: (Sun Sep 25 2005) Continuing his vigorous advocacy for Scientology's solutions to mental health problems, Tom Cruise will deliver a series of four lectures on topics related to "The Modern Science of Mental Health" beginning next month. Co-sponsored by the Citizens Commission on Human Rights, the lectures will be held at Scientology's Celebrity Centre International in Los Angeles. All lectures will be free to the public. Due to limited seating at the Celebrity Centre, tickets will be available only to Scientology parishioners and selected members of the press, but the lectures will be simulcast on the web, and a live video feed will be available for broadcasters who wish to cover these highly informative presentations.

The first lecture, set for October 15, is titled "How Psychiatry Invented Schizophrenia, and What Scientologists Can Do About It".

The second lecture, tentatively scheduled for October 22, is on "Handling Sexual Dis-Orientation: Out of the Closet and Into the Auditing Room".

The topic of the third lecture, in early November, will be "Diagnosis and Treatment of So-Called Clinical Depression with the Hubbard Mark Super VII Quantum Electropsychometer".

The fourth lecture is "Neuroanatomical Changes Resulting from Chronic Methamphetamine Abuse: Can Narconon's Sauna and Niacin Treatment Program Help?"

Image via fark.
Source via [ONTD]


Thanks to an anonymous tip and a story on msnbc this story is a hoax. I was really looking forward to this craziness.


At 6:49 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

It's a hoax, sry.

At 9:35 AM, Blogger Evie said...

Thanks, I noticed that now. Bummer.

At 12:44 PM, Blogger markus said...

dammit! i was looking forward to your review...


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